Notes on Learning Japanese Slowly

I would like to tell a satisfying story about steady progress: a neat stack of notebooks, a daily practice, each lesson opening cleanly into the next. The truth is more seasonal.

There are periods of momentum and long plateaus. Words I know vanish exactly when I need them. A grammar point understood on paper dissolves in conversation.

Attention over fluency

And still, learning changes the texture of travel. A station announcement separates into recognizable pieces. A menu becomes less opaque. A brief exchange carries the small joy of having crossed a distance respectfully.

Fluency is a worthy destination, but attention is available now.

Building a bridge

I am driven to practice or speak by a desire to connect with people, either around me or in preparation for a trip. This can also vary depending on my free time, which always seems to be in short supply. Sometimes this is as simple as making sure I do some Duolingo just so I am doing something, or as deep as cracking open a textbook and working through drills and exercises.

I do not often have the opportunity to meet up with native speakers of Japanese because, honestly, I can be a bit reclusive and private with my free time. I experience the same anxieties and panic that I am sure most people feel when confronted with the idea of throwing themselves out there in a new language.

I find that when it comes to speaking, it is best if I don’t overthink it. Just let it happen organically and focus on the person I am trying to have a conversation with instead of creating a scripted response that I have already thought out. Use words to connect with the person I can see right in front of me. Laugh at my silly mistakes and be open to correction—and to being completely wrong.

Ultimately, language is about conveying meaning in all of its various shades. Organically, through shared dialogue and body language. Across time and space through written language. Bridging the unfathomable distances between each other to share meaning and arrive at a shared understanding.

I love the concept of language and appreciate the role it plays in our species. Without language, there would be no advanced ideas beyond our most basic needs.

Finding the path forward in the dark

I wish there were such a thing as a clear-cut answer to language acquisition. One surefire way, outside of complete immersion, that could grant a person linguistic fluency. But based on my life’s experience thus far… there isn’t one way forward.

Learning Japanese has been a multipronged approach for me. I watch shows and anime in Japanese for enjoyment. I listen to Japanese music. I use Duolingo. Japanese dictionaries. Apps to practice writing. A myriad of notebooks filled with grammar notes and hiragana, katakana, and kanji. I use flashcards. I chant sutras. I use everything I can to create connections in my brain that help me retain what I learn and make it real for me.

I am often asked, “Why? Why Japanese? It’s so difficult. Learn Spanish or German or… insert language here.”

I don’t know that, for me, there is a clear-cut answer. It has to do with my childhood. My teenage years. My adulthood. It has been a lifelong fascination. There isn’t one particular reason, and I have definitely had times when I have despaired over Japanese ever becoming something I could truly make a part of my life.

I always come back.

To conclude this rambling post, I think Japanese, for me, is about the journey. It’s about putting one foot in front of the other and continuing. I may always be a traveler in the dark with a lantern, looking for the path forward, but maybe I am supposed to be just that.

Having finally booked a trip to Japan, I hope all the years of off-and-on study will help somewhat. I am sure it will be an experience unlike any other I have had thus far, but I am just going to try to stay open and experience it for what it is in the moment.